dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
He better not be in your backpack
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Randomize