He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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