My hand turned me down
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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