i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
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