you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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