so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
