I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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