What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
