so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize