Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Randomize
