Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
