whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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