You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
