Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Randomize