overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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