my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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