Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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