Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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