Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
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