whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
