What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
