Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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