i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
33 Sex Crazed People That Are Going Balls Deep
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
21 Family Members Confess The Creepiest Things They Know About a Relative
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.