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I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
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