you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize