cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
