She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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