if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
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