you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
