After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Randomize
