I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Randomize
