YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Actions speak louder than pants.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize
