Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize