I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
She's the barista slut.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
