Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
only you would photoshop your dick
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Randomize
