Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
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