it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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