It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Randomize
