i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
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