Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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