Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
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