Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
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he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
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No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
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