tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
