dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.