I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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