it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
