Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Are we still banned from the library?
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Randomize
