I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
21 NSFW Facts About Famous Celebrities That Will Blow Your Mind
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
These Are 19 of the Most Horrible Strangers People Had to Sit Next to
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad