More tranny stories later!
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Randomize
