***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
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